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Thursday, 4 October 2007

First Person, Omniscient...

I get a call from Bob's agent. You think I move in mysterious ways? Wait 'til you see this guy. Hi Lou, how's business? I'm loving the book. Ah, that's too bad, Lou. Have a little faith, huh; something'll turn up. Oh, sure Lou - anything I can do to help; by the way, I got a great deal this month on Red Sea partings. What's with people nowadays, huh Lou? You remember back in the old days? A parting of the Red Sea would have been a cause for celebration. Now? You can't give 'em away. Sorry Lou, you were saying; about Bob's book. How can I be of service? Ah huh. Mmm hmm. I see. I can appreciate Bob's concerns, Lou and and I sympathise with your plight and that of any would-be publishers, but I'm afraid there's not much I can do. Kind of goes against company policy, you with me Lou? Oh sure, we can do you a broad outline, give you a general idea of what happens in the end - day become night, skies fallling, mountains crumbling to the sea and so on and so forth. But anything more specific than that would be way off bounds, I'm afraid. Ah huh. Mmm hmm. Well, I'd love for him to be right, Lou - really I would. That Hleb's one hell of a player. And those shorts. But it really would violate one of our most important rules to tell you any more. And you know what sticklers we are for the rule book up here, Lou. It's all spelled out in my own book, as a matter of interest. You really should have a look at it sometime. It really is a good book, even if I say so Myself. Mmm, not so good Lou. Sales have been better. A lot of competition in the Spiritual and Lifestyle sector right now. But we live in hope. Look, I'm really sorry, Lou; I wish there was something more that I could do, but you know how it is - my hands are tied. It's like I'm always saying to my boy; I might be omnipresent, but you can't expect me to be everywhere at the same time. Mmm hmm. Yep, that's life. Ah huh. Well, that's football. Take a look at last night. Mmm Hmm. Ah-huh. Yep, me too. Some accumulator; Valencia, Liverpool, Milan. So, the kids go hungry. Ah well, what are you going to do? Sure thing Lou. And thanks for being so understanding. OK, Lou; you too. Ah huh. Amen to that.

L.U.V. on y'all,


Hear Bob read extracts from his diary of the 2007-08 season, "The Road to Moscow"!!

Bobcasts now available at iTunes!!

Bobcasts now available at Jellycast!!

1 comment:

  1. A lot of competition in the Spiritual and Lifestyle sector right now. Indeed there is. The category is saturated. Try Sport and Arcane Sexual Activities.