How to make a theft-proof Kindle case in a few simple steps...

First you'll need one of these:

You can either nip over here and pick one up for £111 (free delivery) or you can wait like I did and get one as an early birthday present/late inheritence from a deceased relative... or should that be a deceased inheritence from a late aunt? Either way, once you've got one, you'll need some of this 'very useful stuff':

...one of these (or similar):

...and one of these:

Now, making sure you've disabled the safety catch and that you're holding the blade *away* from your body, take the Stanley knife to the crease of the inside of the book like so:

Having completely removed the soft centre of the book leaving only the hard exterior shell, apply two strips from the same roll of the hook and loop tape like so:

Now cut two slightly smaller strips from the other roll of hook and loop tape and apply them to the back (that's the side without the screen for those of you who are new to your Kindle) of the reading device like so, being careful not to obscure the rather nifty little speakers at the top:

Now all that's left is for you to mount the Kindle onto the inside back of the gutted book and you have your very own durable and lightweight protective case for the princely sum of £1 (plus one secondhand hardback book):

And just in case you don't believe me, here's one in action - and yes, before you all write in, I know there's nothing on the screen. I just happen to be a very big fan of blank verse:

Of course, you might not like the sight of frayed paper everytime you open up your Kindle reader, but fear not! The electrician's tape is never far from hand here at Swipe Towers. Indeed, we dread the day he comes 'round asking for it back. In the meantime, it's just the johnny for tidying up the inner spine:

Of course, I can't swear for certain that it's theft proof. But I'd think the odds are fairly slender on something like this being whipped from your tote bag:

Happy reading!

xxx
Bob