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Monday, 13 December 2010

My Amy's True...

[...somewhere deep in darkest cyberspace, coffee is being drunk...]
"So Bob, who's the most famous person you've ever met then?"

"When you say *met*, would you include singing 'Oliver's Army' in the vague direction of someone in a near-empty cinema?"

"Erm, no - not really..."

"Oh well, that rules Elvis Costello out then. I was once given two pounds by Patti Boulaye whilst busking. I gave it back of course - thinking she could buy me off with the Tory dollar - the very cheek of it. Robert Wyatt's wife, Alfie, she threw some coins into the hat and said 'he liked 'Psycho Killer', but I'm not sure how much. Didn't have the heart to tell her I'd been singing 'Don't worry about the government..."

"Is that it? God almighty, you've led a sheltered life..."

"Nah, nah I was just trying to remember them, is all. There's Rufus, obviously. And Sally Margaret Joy out of Furniture - remember them? "You must be out of your brilliant mind..." Gerald Harper - he used to live in the house opposite hours around the time he was in Hadleigh. Sir Harrison Birtwistle; he taught me how to play the flute. At least I *think* it was a flute; anyway, I had to give it up after it got stuck up a nostril. He was great, old Harry. Completely round the twist, but a lovely lad. That bloke from the Lighning Seeds who wrote 'Three Lions on the Shirt' lives in their old house now. Can't tell you what it's done to the house prices... Steve Coppell once kicked a ball back to me during a charity 5-a-side tournament. I scored twice in a 3-1 group stage match before we were eliminated in the quarters. He declined to take up the option of a trial, unfortunately. I've also shared a car with Rodney Marsh. He had it at weekends and on Wednesdays and I had it the rest of the time. Economical, ethical and quite a bit of a goer when you put your foot down - the car wasn't bad either. I've had my photo taken with Stan Bowles too - he was a bit of a lad. You'd never believe he and Peter were brothers really, would you? How about you Ames?"

"Well, I don't know where to start - I've probably met everyone who is or has been anyone really. But it's not all it's cracked up to be, is it - fame?

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