Monday, 13 December 2010
On Golden Pond...
[...somewhere in darkest cyberspace, a contented sigh, followed by a deep inhalation from a freshly lit cigarette...]
"Did the so-called Doctor know you were a smoker Ames?"
"He probably had an inkling. I mean, there's only so many times you can tell someone you're just popping out for a breath of fresh air in the darkest corners of deep space before you start arousing suspicion. [...pause...] ...Mmm... that was *so* nice...Didn't hurt anywhere near as much as I thought it would."
"You're not seriously trying to tell me that was your first time...??"
"No, I was talking about the calliper, actually."
"But you can still see why I'd want to get it sanded down?"
"Oh sure. I mean, personally I don't mind a bit of thigh grazing. But it's you that's got to wear it all day..."
"And you were OK with all the static?"
"Hmmm - I suppose I'd have to try it with one of us not wearing any tights, just for the comparison. But no, it was mildly hair-raising I suppose - but in a good way."
[Long pause...] "...so, did I...you know...live up to your expectations then?"
"Oh yes - definitely! In fact, it was *exactly* like being savaged by Tony Hancock in drag...in a good way, obviously."
[Even longer pause...] "...and how did I compare to....you know..."
"The Doctor? [pause] ...Look, I think we should just enjoy the moment and not rake over old coals. All I know is that we're here and it's now and I had a really, really lovely time. Honestly. [Whispering] Thank you..."
"So I make you happy then...?"
"Yes Bob. You do. Plus I get to catch up my reading, so yeah...It's good."
"How are you finding the B.S. Johnson?"
"Oh, it's a bit confusing, isn't it? I mean, I keep shuffling the pages and finding I'm re-reading the same section. But no, it's cool..."
"Right young lady; I'm going to get some shut eye. Can you just make sure you've stubbed your cigarette out before you turn the light out. Don't want to burn the attic down, do we?"
"Aye aye Cap'n! Night night Bob."
"Good night Amy. Sweet dreams..."