Thanks to the recently returned from Cornish Cornwall (and bloomin' lovely first bint of blog) Spinsterella (or "Spinny" as those who owe her money call her in a vain attempt to ingratiate themselves and fend off repayment of the debt for another 6 months - you'll get your bloody money!) for this "Are you a Bint" questionnaire pinched from the wonderfully named Bint magazine. For those who thought that bints (is it too obvious that I love that word?) were just cack-handed sex objects placed on earth to act as an unpaid repository for their men folk's diseased and rotting/eloquent and well girthed [delete as applicable] sexual organs who are also quite handy in the kitchen and 'making good' around the house - then think again! They are creatures capable of wit, erudition and if you treat them right, they might even be persuaded to 'blow on your candle' (as I believe the expression has it...) as well as giving you something to do with your todger when you're not down the boozer or there's an inexplicable gap in the fixture list etc. (....or in my case, treating it with an unpleasant bicarbonate of soda and savlon based poultice...) And what's more, these modern bints can hold their own on a BOGOF Bacardi Breezer Binge (at least they can before they inevitably end up on their backs with their vomit-sprayed legs in the air in a shopping precinct in Bury St. Edmonds yelling "Fnaaarr Cun - shitAAAAAAARRRRRK" at no one in particular....) And they know their Thierry Henrys from their Lucas Neils - although the technicalities of the offside rule are no doubt still some way beyond them....
btw - in the unlikely event that anyone's interested, I scored 65.5%. There is even a graphic to prove it. [Well, there was one there but it seems to have disappeared - you'll just have to take my word for it now, won't you??]
"And annover fing, it does make a lovely bit of apple crumble...."
© 2006 Swipe Enterprises
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