[Parkinson theme, applause, Parky sashays down steps and sits down. To camera:]
Parky: Good evening, my first guest this evening...mumble mumble...incomprehensible slur...cramming the last 14 syllables into one at the end of a sentence ...something about Barnsley...."they f**k you up, your Mum and Dad..."...Geoffrey Boycott maiden test century...lazen gelmen, Mr. Philip Larkin...
[Philip Larkin sashays down the stairs as the Ronnie Hazlehurst Orchestra plays a jazzy arrangement of the Damned's 'I Just Can't Be Happy Today'...]
Parky: Nice to have you on the show, Philip...
Larkers: Tosspots.
Parky: Ladies and gentlemen - Mr. Philip Larkin!
[audience applause, exit theme....]
© 2007 Swipe Enterprises
Oh dear. I recently won a bottle of vodka in a pub quiz, and had just poured myself a gentle slug of it...
ReplyDelete...half of which is now dripping off my computer screen.
There are specialist products that you can use to clean your screen you know Tim....
ReplyDelete(Although, that said, as you've got the empty tumbler there already.....)
That sort of thing is what television is for I reckon.
ReplyDelete(The Parky v Larky bit I mean, not the vodka on the screen thing.)
I'd like to see Shakespeare on the New Paul O'Grady show.
You mean a sort of "such is the stuff from whence dreams are woven - 'ere, didn't you pinch my tits at the Garston Dockers & Stevedores grab a granny night for a bet...." kinda thing?
ReplyDeleteQuite right - I think we should tell Barry Took, don't you?
L.U.V. on ya,
Bob
When are you appearing on Parky, Bob?
ReplyDeleteWhere's Mary Whitehouse when you need her? She should go on Dame Edna (even though she's been dead for years - but if she was alive - it would be good).
ReplyDeleteI'm doing a duet with Robbie Williams - so whenever he's on next Billster. Soon I would think as his follow up album of big band tunes is due out soon and he can be relied on to promote "I'll Swing For You" quite vigorously....
ReplyDeleteDidn't she have her own show, RO-MO...the one with those two professors acting like schoolkids and "milky milky...."??? Oh and talking of TV appearances - when is your appearance on "F*** Off! I've got big boobs"???
L.U.V. on ya,
Bob
F+*k off I've not got big boobs but am going to be posting up another quality rock t-shirt photo soon - don't forget to take the bromide in your tea!! Luv on ya big boy XXX
ReplyDeleteCareful what you say to RoMo Bob for chriminy's sake...
ReplyDeleteHave ye not heard of the terrible death stare?
Nick Robinson, the BBC politico without the manky ears, was doing a piece live from Hull the other night. Quite uncanny.
ReplyDelete