A Big Thank You To Tim Footman For Sorting Out Today's Post For Me - THANKS TIM!!!

[.....apologies to anyone who looked at this yesterday and found the post less than ideally presented. Due to computer crapness and server shittiness, I was unable to correct initial errors which were hastily posted with typical impatience. Hopefully this reposting will be worth revisiting. Sorry guys....]


Woah-arooni Swipesters!!!


Yesterday, quietly surfing the web for cheap immigrant/farmyard animal porn as is my wont, I come across this over at Cultural Snow..... Seems the dashing Tim has been tagged - Christ only knows what it's all about - but skipping the blah-di-blah and getting to the meat and two veg of it. Get this at the end of Tim's post:

Right then. I tag... Bob Swipe, because he makes me laugh, and The Spinster, because she's distractingly wiggly, apparently, and Joel from Robotic Hat, so he can disprove my calumny that his musical tastes are 'wacky'. You go, girl. And, er, boys.


Anyways, to the chase (after thanking Tim for the nice words - he doesn't realise that I'm trying to be deadly serious here, obviously...) I think the deal is I have to list tracks that conform to certain specs or some such idiocy or other - but she-it, it certainly saves me having to think up anything witty to post for at least a couple days - tomorrow I am expecting a heap load of feedback from all you budding Jesus & the Mary Chains out there....so, feet up and coast. Here's Bob's twenty tag tracks.....(my nominations to carry the baton follow at the end in a desperate - and doubtless futile - attempt to get you sons and daughters of so & sos to read to the end......


1. A track from your early childhood



This would have to be All Kinds of Everything by Dana. Way before the emergence of the 'International' version whose Israeli transvestism set the Eurovison (and half the dang middle east) on fire in the late 90s, I'd twigged that to get ahead in this world, a guy's occasionally gotta be prepared to be a gal every now and then. Consequently, my 4 or 5 year old's response to the enquiry, "and what would you like to be when you grow up young man??" was invariably, "Dana..." Needless to say, I never quite pulled it off (....make up your own gags...) but I still have the frock at home to prove it.....

2. A track that you associate with your first love

There goes my first love by the Drifters. And you know something? To this day, I couldn't tell you why.....

3. A track that reminds you of a holiday trip



A whole album, in fact. Anything off Rain Dogs by Tom Waits. I fell in love with this LP as a 21 year-old who'd lucked out and was looking after a young, weird French chef's Paris apartment for him whilst he was skiing in the South of France - I'd arrived with nowhere to stay and precious little cash and met Christophe in a bar....couple drinks....an offer he couldn't refuse...one soggy copy of Paris Match later .... you know the deal. I tape-to-taped the album over a TDK gold copy of Blonde on Blonde I'd brought with me from a cassette belonging to an Australian guy called John Powers (yup, he'd actually been named after the whiskey...) who was studying at the Sorbonne and who is/was the living rebuttal to every stereotype of the Aussue as a culturally bereft sporty type with as much idea of who Marcel Proust was as a deranged dingo with kennel cough. God bless you John, I hope you're out there somewhere, having fun. If I had to pick a track, I guess Tango til they're sore (or daisies) will have to do

4. A track that you like but wouldn’t want to be associated with in public

I guess this is where I have to own up to my Wings fetish. Probably the endlessly groovy Arrow Through Me off the relentlessly under-rated Back to the Egg LP.

5. A track that accompanied you when you were lovesick

The Beautiful Ones by Prince cast it's lengthy shadow over the courting of Ma Swipe (the first)..."do you want him, or do you want me? Cos I want you......." One of the great vocal performances. Unfortunately, she chose me in the end...

6. A track that you have probably listened to most often



Quite possibly This Charming Man by The Smiths. Failing that, Sound & Vision, David Bowie.

7. A track that is your favourite instrumental



It's a three way tie between King Curtis' (pictured) Memphis Soul Stew, Booker T. & the MGs' Green Onions or Lennon'sBeef Jerky, from Walls & Bridges. Note the food theme, Freudians....

8. A track that represents one of your favourite bands

Miss Amanda Jones, The Rolling Stones. Could pick any one of a hundred of theirs, but that popped into my head straight off today, for some reason. It's on the unfathomably neglected LP Between the Buttons.


9. A track which represents yourself best

Either Baby Let's Play House by Elvis Presley, or Twist & Shout by The Beatles. They are the ones I keep going back to and getting the same buzz.

10. A track that reminds you of a special occasion (which one?)

Do they know it's Christmas? by Band Aid II. Reminds me of a fabulous Christmas when I got an Elvis, the Complete 60s Masters boxed set AND a mini disc player for Christmas. Wow, that was some Christmas morning, I can tell you!! I certainly knew it was Christmas, I can tell you...

11. A track that you can relax to



An Ending (Ascent) or Deep Blue Day from Eno's Apollo: atmospeheres and soundtracks.

12. A track that stands for a really good time in your life

Young, gifted & black by Bob & Marcia. Childhood: power cuts, jacket potatoes, the Likely Lads, England not qualifying for World cups - you know the deal.

13. A track that is currently your favourite

Off the Record. On Z by My Morning Jacket. Oh, and the opener on the new Belle & Sebastian is triff an' all.

14. A track that you’d dedicate to your best friend

Sometimes I don't know what to feel by Todd Rundgren (A Wizard/A True Star) - "Today I watched a car run my little dog under it's wheels", sings Todd. By the way, I ran my best friend's dog over once, I guess I shoulda explianed that first...

15. A track that you think nobody but you likes



Water on Glass by Kim Wilde.

16. A track that you like especially for its lyrics

Oscilate Wildly, The Smiths.

17. A track that you like that’s neither English nor German

Remember by Air. (They're from France, I believe...)

18. A track that lets you release tension best

Tension by Killing Joke.

19. A track that you want to be played on your funeral

Ernie by Benny Hill.

20. A track that you’d nominate for the ‘best of all time’ category

I'm Loving Nothing by Curtis Mayfield & the Impressions. That or, I wish I could Fly by Keith Harris & Orville.

I bagsy Brian Damage, Ceridwen Devi and The Rock Mother to to their thang....over to you.....



Love on y'all,



Bob






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