Further updates from our new celebrity guff stalking website, Tommy Squeaker.com..
Earlier we reported that a silent but violent emanating from the lovely Scarlet Johansson had been observed wafting towards 53rd and Lexington. Well, we can confirm that the sighting is getting more interesting by the minute....
Johansson: just act as if nothing is happening....and walk very, very slowly...
12:37 - The smell is lingering a lot longer than even the most virulent of Sunday roast let offs, not even when they're trapped under a cushion do they draw quite this much attention to themselves. We think something big has come up and we're not ruling out the possibility that Scarlet might have actually followed through. There's a distinct vindaloo undercurrent to the aroma, now moving towards the intersection of Broadway and 5th Avenue at Times Square. Things are a little diarroahral here at present, to say the least, as we've just run into a mobile press conference being held by Anne Wintour outside the Conde Nast office - there's so much shit stink around that it's almost impossible to be sure that we're not standing up to our ankles in a big cack of it, let alone whether we're still even on the track of the one Scarlet let slip seven or eight minutes ago. Although it's obviously very hard to be precise in these circumstances, our best guess is that's she's heading Downtown for the public conveniences outside Penn Station. We would be very surprised if Scarlet is not touching cotton by the time she gets there.
Pop socks - the star's best friend in the war against thigh trickle....
More news as we get it.....
Love on ya,
Bob
© 2006 Swipe Enterprises
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