Tuesday, 29 August 2006
Old-style Bob Post...
BBC Breakfast News:
Age Concern reports that 9/10 NHS nurses don't have time to feed those among their drool and piss riddled elderly charges who have difficulty eating and digesting their food, so they are needlessly dying in large numbers. Several of these Larkinesque 'old fools' have, on having popped their clogs been dissected, revealing them to have empty bowels congruent with the new all caring and patient-centred NHS starvation diet ("your painless 1 step route to weight loss and slow, bowel shrivelling termination...") So, be warned Swipesters - come our day, only those of us still able to fork a soupcon of that Third World size portion of macrobiotic rice into our dry and muscleless cakeholes will stand any chance at all of making it past reception, never mind the ward sister. Still, as always there's a silver lining to every cloud. At least it does free up a bed for someone else to perish in.
A visibly shocked and Egyptian pendant dedecked Kate Silverton weighs into the hapless Health Minister. "Old tossers are QUITE LITERALLY dying without any SHIT inside them - it's a NATIONAL DISGRACE and nothing short of SCANDALOUS!!!
I miss the rest of the argument, staring entranced and lovelorn at Caroline Flint's scandalously gorgeous, ripe, untramelled boobies.
She's *far* too fit to be a politician....
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