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Wednesday, 2 July 2014

Old, New, Borrowed & Blue...

In honour of the forthcoming nuptials, and what with the recent craze (see Molly, Billy, Patroclus et. al.) for meme (it's just been meme, meme, meme of late, hasn't it??) I thought it was about time somebody did something a bit more experimental than merely listing the random playlists generated by their i-pod. This, by the way, has nothing to do with the fact that I've just bollocksed mine up by trying to format it as a hard disc drive so that I can use i-tunes on both the old Bro-in-Law's hand-me-down PC and the (I'll whisper this so as not to offend A. Radiographer...) brand new, state of the art, very expensive, wi-fi-enabled laptop we bought at the weekend, along with a swanky new wireless router for a stupendous amount of moolah. All 2,897 of the songs I'd painstakingly loaded onto it over the last 6 months have been wiped off. There's now just one track on it - 'Slo Fuzz' by Sol Seppy, a freebie off i-storethatsellsyoustuffyoucan'tfuckingwellplay. It seems to like that one. (Serves you right, you cocky cunting rich girl, I hear you cry - and I can't argue with you on that score. After all, there's nothing that warms the heart more than the techno sob stories of over-privileged, underemployed blogtossers, is there?)

So rather than set you a quiz in which all you'd have to do is track down 'Slo fuzz' by Sol Seppy and memorise the first line, I thought we'd do what I was always being told to do when I were a nipper - namely, make up us own entertainment. (Although, come to think of it, nobody in my family actually spoke anything like that at all.) The rules are simple enough for an Asda Window Display Operative to get their head around - simply post up the following:

Something you've already posted. (The blog age reaches its celebratory self-conscious phase...)

Something you hadn't previously posted. (But its still got the potential to surprise...)

Something someone else has already posted (or just the link, if you're squeamish about all that beastly copyright jazz). (because it's ultimately a very generous medium...)


....something that's blue. (because......erm...)

Oh alright, it's a shit idea, but I've already typed it up this far, so I might as well stick with it to the bitter end, I suppose.....

(btw - Re; the nuptials - I just threw that bit in. I'm sure some of you blighters must be getting hitched someday soon....)

So, here we go - Old, New, Borrowed & Blue:


Florian Sings!!!

Yo Swipettes!!

A new spot in which we ask Kraftwerk frontman Florian Schneider to provide a little musical interlude to help us start the day with a song in our hearts and a tap in our feet. This week, Florian will be treating us to a selection from the songbook of the great Lancashire comedian, George Formby. Take it away Florian!!!

ein, swei, drei, vier..

(boom tisk ka-ka, boom tisk ka-ka...)

I em leanink on zer lamppost at zer corner of zer street,
In case a zertain lee-tall lay-tee comst by
Oh me, oh my,
I hope zer lee-tall lay-tee ghost by.
I don't know eef she'll gate avay,
She does nicht alvays gate avay,
But anyvay I know zat she veal try.
Oh me, oh my,
I hope zer lee-tall lady comst by.

I em leanink on zer lamppost at zer corner of zer street,
In case zer zertain leetall lay-tee comst by
Ve're talking zehr schon
Zer zer-tain

(boom tisk ka-ka, boom tisk ka-ka...)

Next week: Florian sings a Wurzels medley...I am zer Zider Trinker, I have zer brandt neue Combineharzesterhaltestelle and many, many more!!


Pop Groups My Dad Couldn't Quite Say the Names of Properly...

Spandau Ballet (Spendo Ballendo)

Ultravox (Utravolox)

Mike Flowers' Pops (Mike's Pops Fing - occasionally My Flowers Popsies)


It just had to be Brian's The Man in Black joke. Thanks Bri. (Sorry, thanks Teri....)


finally, how much more blue can you get than this "Someone's Pinched Me Sausages"-era blue David Bowie???

None more.

© 2006 Swipe Enterprises

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